Relationship Talk: I feel bad for losing interest in her after some bad dates

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I don't know why I feel so sad for ceasing my interest in someone I had a number of bad dates with.

I don’t know why I feel guilty this way. It gets so bad that I sometimes cry.

Dear Bukky,

I asked this lady out but she refused. We've had dates at cafes about four times. The last time was two months ago. 

At the cafe, she did some things that pissed me off: she came late and didn't apologise, acted rudely, was deliberately quiet and avoided talking to me and so on.

Meanwhile two days before now she was all excited when we met and talked. This act of being quiet and avoiding me always happened at the cafes on three occasions.

The last time got me confused and fed up. 

I decided to let her be and started to mind my own business. Ever since then though she's looking for a way to talk to me but I'm no longer interested.

Recently for no just cause, I've been feeling guilty as if I'm keeping malice with her.

Meanwhile whenever we see I greet her and go about my own business.

Why am I feeling guilty? Sometimes I end up crying.

I'm thinking of calling her up for a meet so I can just plainly tell her that it's not as if I have any problem with her but that I just don't want any more drama of her acting quiet and avoiding me.
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Hi, Reader,

I think it is easy enough.

Your case is almost the same as wanting something and not reaching out to get it, or missing someone and not reaching out to call them when that’s all it’s going to take.

I’m not saying you are missing her, I’m just saying you need to do anything that’s going to guarantee your peace of mind.

If calling her is what you want to do, what are you waiting for?

I think clarifying things with her via that call would take away the guilt.

Just call her and lay your mind bare. Let her know there are no hard feelings [if there are none], and that you just don’t see the need in pursuing an intimate friendship with her anymore.

You’ll be good.
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